The Big Ask

This is the link to my Just Giving page. Thanks you so much for all of your support.

https://www.justgiving.com/crowdfunding/deanna-wilson?utm_id=1&utm_term=DGDaJGzRE
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The Decision

Today was the day, 2 months after my secondary breast cancer diagnosis, that I was meant to have all the answers. I thought I’d go in, sit down and be told “right, this is the action plan….” and I’d walk out the door feeling relieved.
When is life ever like that? Never.
What actually happened was that I went in and told that my story is a complicated one (no shit!).
I have cancer in the base of my spine, my hip and femur. The femur is the part that physically could use getting looked at first. The particular area where there’s most ‘activity’ is at the top of the bone, before the knobbly bit (excuse my complex medical jargon) and is the most likely part to fracture or break. The idea would be to drill through the top of the bone, insert a metal rod and put a few screws in down the length of my thigh. Nice right? Doesn’t sound utterly terrifying at all!
Looks a bit like this

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Hopefully mine will happen before the fracture occures

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Fuuuucckkkk!

Now, the complicated bit. From most of the tests I’ve had, it would seem most of my pain is actually coming from the area in my back. So, if I had this surgery first, I’d have post surgery pain (a lot of it) as well as my existing level of pain. There are other negatives too. Surgery comes with all kinds of risks, namely infection and blood clots. Add into the mix that we are getting married in August after a long haul flight and that risk is even higher.
With so many problems, maybe it’s time to look at option 2? That is, blast the area in my back with radiotherapy and try to address the pain in that area first. Once that’s done, we head off, get married and once I’m home, I have the surgery and radiotherapy in my leg.
Seems like a fairly straightforward decision? Well, except for the fact that if I don’t get this surgery, I’m very likely going to break that bone. It could be as simple as banging it against a table or falling over my dog (he LOVES getting in the way). I can’t even begin to imagine the pain involved with breaking my femur. It makes me feel pretty sick thinking about it.
The decision isn’t so easy now…

It may have crossed your mind while reading this that the wedding shouldn’t be given as high a priority as my health. At this point though, the wedding is of higher priority to me. I have loved Steph for almost ten years and planned on getting married for over two. This illness is not going away and is not getting better. I would rather lose my entire leg than be denied the opportunity to marry him. This wedding is happening! It’s what we both have to get us through the difficulties that have been and are still in the pipeline. I want whatever happens next to happen as his wife and with him my husband.

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The best reason I can think of to go through this

So, the next step forward is for the surgeon to go off and consult with his wee surgeon friends and my oncologist and get them to take votes/draw straws on what they think they should do.
I should find out in a day or two. Any opinions are welcome. Maybe we should do a tally and send it to the surgeon to enable his decision making process.
Every one for option 1, raise your hands?